It's easy to say that life has its ups and downs. Yet, in my case. I tend to dwell on the "downs." Life is not going the way I want it to - but when does it ever?
SLOWLY I am finding out who my true friends are. Ever since my break up with my ex-boyfriend, I felt as though people are turning against me and house some sort of resentment toward me. Some people admitted it and made it clear that they do. One friend told me that the way I handled everything with my ex is the ONLY way some people see me - which brings up the fact that so many people are one sided thinkers. Some people only see one side of the story (my ex's) and ignore the other (mine). Some people - those who I consider to be my real friends - see both sides of the story and understand the way I feel and the way I process my predicament and they still accept me for it. My real friends are the ones who try to console me and cheer me up. And those "friends" of mine that really house resentment toward me but still pretend to me my "friends" .... well news flash to them - you guys aren't my friends... you're all just acquaintances. You don't deserve to be my friends and I don't deserve to be friends with people whose mission in life is to put me down and say shit.
Today, catching up with a friend, with whom I was temporarily disconnected, opened my eyes. At first I thought she had given up on me - that she just got annoyed and tired of all of my problems and ditched me. That's what it felt like the day after my break up. She said she'd be there to console me and cheer me up, and then all of a sudden she ditched me to hang out with her other friends. That hurt me and I disconnected myself from her - but only temporarily. Things started looking up between us when she greeted me a "Happy Birthday" on my birthday. Then we started talking randomly and the concern she showed for me one day just allowed me to feel like we were reconnecting. I admit that I harbored some sort of resentment towards her for ditching me but then I realized that no matter hoe I disconnected myself from her, she still managed to be there for me when she saw that I did. That means a lot. I feel as though we reconnected today - like the girl who I referred to as "SEESTER" really is there for me no matter what.
She put a smile on my face and brightened my rainy day. :D
<3
SLOWLY I am finding out who my true friends are. Ever since my break up with my ex-boyfriend, I felt as though people are turning against me and house some sort of resentment toward me. Some people admitted it and made it clear that they do. One friend told me that the way I handled everything with my ex is the ONLY way some people see me - which brings up the fact that so many people are one sided thinkers. Some people only see one side of the story (my ex's) and ignore the other (mine). Some people - those who I consider to be my real friends - see both sides of the story and understand the way I feel and the way I process my predicament and they still accept me for it. My real friends are the ones who try to console me and cheer me up. And those "friends" of mine that really house resentment toward me but still pretend to me my "friends" .... well news flash to them - you guys aren't my friends... you're all just acquaintances. You don't deserve to be my friends and I don't deserve to be friends with people whose mission in life is to put me down and say shit.
Today, catching up with a friend, with whom I was temporarily disconnected, opened my eyes. At first I thought she had given up on me - that she just got annoyed and tired of all of my problems and ditched me. That's what it felt like the day after my break up. She said she'd be there to console me and cheer me up, and then all of a sudden she ditched me to hang out with her other friends. That hurt me and I disconnected myself from her - but only temporarily. Things started looking up between us when she greeted me a "Happy Birthday" on my birthday. Then we started talking randomly and the concern she showed for me one day just allowed me to feel like we were reconnecting. I admit that I harbored some sort of resentment towards her for ditching me but then I realized that no matter hoe I disconnected myself from her, she still managed to be there for me when she saw that I did. That means a lot. I feel as though we reconnected today - like the girl who I referred to as "SEESTER" really is there for me no matter what.
She put a smile on my face and brightened my rainy day. :D
<3
"I've made mistakes in my life. I've let people take advantage of me and I've expected way less than what I deserve. But, I've learned from my bad choices and even though there are some things can never get back and people who will never be sorry. I know better next time and won't settle for anything less than what I deserve"
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